Absurdly Specific and Outlandish NBA Finals Prediction Roundtable


  • Overall series result.

Jonah: Warriors in 7.

Cleveland’s defense keeps it close and LeBron gets dozens of free-throws when games are in Cleveland. Warriors blow out the Cavs in two of the four games in Oakland, including an anti-climactic Game 7.

Jared: Warriors in 5.

It seems a little crazy to pick against LeBron, but there it is. I’m not particularly impressed with dispatching the Celtics, injured Bulls and injured Hawks. They will finally miss Love in this series. The Warriors have been significantly better all year.

Ryan: Warriors in 5.

The Dubs have faced two teams that are already better than the Cavs in both Memphis and Houston and handled them in less than the max.  The series will be eerily like the finals of last year where it was clear the Spurs could all pass and had more players who could make shots and big plays than just 1-3 guys on the heat. Lebron will score more than 40 points in multiple games but it will only lead to one win.  Lebron will get cramps again because he’ll need to do everything.  Lebron will try to clone himself and insert a fresh version of himself into the second half from game 3 on. This will be discovered when Lebron in a desperate attempt to win a series he knows he can’t will accidentally come out of the locker room to enter the game forgetting a version of himself is already on the court.  The NBA will have a new scandal to deal with that will lead the way into stem cell research and Lebron will spearhead the movement and by 2030 an army of Lebron James’s will invade Russia.  Lebron Lebron Lebron…oh yeah the Cavs are in the finals too…

David: Warriors in 6.

After 4 close games (2 in Oakland, 2 in Cleveland with each team winning and losing a home game), Dubs hit their stride on both sides of the ball and have their two best games of the Finals winning the championship in front of a silent Cavs crowd.

  • Game 1, Halftime Score:

Jonah: Cavs 43, Warriors 40.

Rust and jitters.

Jared: Warriors 55, Cavs 47.

It probably won’t be pretty! When did these guys last play a game?

Ryan: Dubs 60 Lebron 40

David: GSW 56, Cavs 51.

I can see rust and jitters but think this means turnovers and points off turnovers.

  • Game 1, Final Score:

Jonah: Warriors 96, Cavs 90.

Less rust. Jitters gone. Euphoria in the Bay Area.

Jared: Warriors 105, Cavs 90.

I wish I thought this was going to be closer. I wish I could hope anything good happened to a team with JR Smith on it.

Ryan: Dubs 115, Cavs 98

David: Warriors 112, Cavs 106.

LeBron comes on like a beast, Curry closes it out at the FT line.

  • Game 1, Draymond Green three-point shooting:

Jonah: 3 for 8 from deep.

Jared: 2 for 6.

Ryan: 2 for 7.

David: 1 for 9. Lots of open looks, bad misses but the make comes late in the 4th and is critical to the win.

Draymond...from the great beyond.

Draymond…from the great beyond.

  • Game 1, Draymond Green stat line:

Jonah: 17 pts / 13 reb / 5 ast / 2 blk / 1 stl

Jared: 12 pts / 11 reb / 6 ast / 1 blk / 2 stl

Ryan: 15 pts / 10 reb / 5 ast / 1 blk / 2 stl

David: 10 pts / 15 reb / 8 ast / 3 blk / 2 stl

  • Game 1, team three-point shooting totals:

Jonah: GSW: 9-23, CLE 6-25

Jared: GSW: 12-30, CLE 7-27

Ryan: Dubs: 15-33, CLE 6-27

David: GSW: 10-24, CLE 4-18

  • Game 1, LeBron field goal attempts:

Jonah: 11 of 27 (FGM-FGA)

Jared: 8 of 20

Ryan: 15 of 30

David: 12 of 24

  • Game 1, Steph Curry assists to turnovers:

Jonah: 8 assists to 4 turnovers

Jared: 9 assists to 5 turnovers

Ryan: 10 assists to 3 turnovers

David: 10 assists to 5 turnovers

  • Game 1, Tristan Thompson rebounds:

Jonah: 4 offensive, 14 total

Jared: 4 offensive, 12 total

Ryan: 5 off, 10 total

David: 2 offensive, 10 total

  • What will you be feeling after Game 1 (be honest)?

Jonah: Relief.

Jared: Sadness. Bring back last year’s playoffs!

Ryan: Hopefully drunk and a little stoned

David: Giddy with joy! A Finals win despite the nerves, pressure and I’m there for it!

Other thoughts:

Jonah: At some point, Riley Curry’s picture will be taken with the Larry O’Brien trophy.

Jared: LeBron is going to make my predictions look foolish!

Ryan: The East in the Cavs will play a Western Conference team.  Enough said.

David: Long moment, hug between Steph and Lebron, Mo Speights goes off in Cleveland, Mark Jackson cries.


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