NBA Finals: Unofficial Game Plans


Game 1

On the dry-erase board in the visiting (CLE) locker room at Oracle Arena, on Thursday, June 2, before Game 1 of the NBA Finals, you probably didn’t see:

  • Dellavedova punch Iguodala in the nuts

That was probably not one of the five key bulletin points. However, I wouldn’t be shocked if LeBron whispered to Delly, “Get under Iggy’s skin.”

On the dry-erase board in the visiting (CLE) locker room at Oracle Arena, on Thursday, June 2, before Game 1 of the NBA Finals, you probably didn’t see:

  • Slow down Shaun Livingston’s mid-range game

Livingston’s 20 points were a season high. The Cavs spent so much energy on Klay and Steph, someone unsuspecting was bound to score lots of points. Turns out it was most of the Warriors bench, each scoring between 10 and 20.

Game 2

On the dry-erase board in the home (GS) locker room at Oracle Arena, on Sunday, June 5, before Game 2 of the NBA Finals, you probably didn’t see:

  • Barnes elbow Love in the back of the head while leaping for a rebound

Love’s 21 sad minutes in Game 2 (2 of 7 from the field, 5 points, 3 rebounds) left a lot to be desired, but the dizziness that came after the Barnes elbow was a problem for Cleveland’s offense.

On the dry-erase board in the visiting (CLE) locker room at Oracle Arena, on Sunday, June 5, before Game 2 of the NBA Finals, you probably didn’t see:

  • Run Draymond Off the Three-Point Line at All Costs!

But there was the box score after the game: Green 5 of 8, Curry 4 of 8, Thompson 4 of 8

 

Possible Game 3 Game Plans

Cleveland

  • Food poisoning the room service sandwiches at the Warriors hotel
  • Making Andrew Bogut sleep in a very uncomfortable bed to upset his back
  • Punching Andre Iguodala in the testicles
  • Getting Klay Thompson in foul trouble
  • Locking Draymond Green in the hotel sauna
  • Power outage at the Warriors hotel

 

Golden State

  • Elbowing Kevin Love in the head again
  • Whispering to Kyrie Irving that dribbling through a forest of defenders is the best approach
  • Keeping J.R. Smith from one of his patented hot streaks by defending him with ice pack-hands
  • Continuing to keep Channing Frye on the bench

 

These playoffs have been filled with blowouts. Let’s hope Games 3 and 4 bring some sort of 4th quarter drama to the proceedings. And yet…

The sight of empty seats for the final four minutes of the 4th quarter refueled my annoyance with Bay Area wealthy/party-going fans. Don’t go to a damn NBA Finals game if you aren’t going to stay until the end. Someone else would have enjoyed all 48 game minutes. Your team won. Sit there until the fucking horn sounds.

 

 

 

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